The Desire To Change.

I have been wanting to write more.  However, for the longest time writing has been a difficult process.  I have so many thoughts going through my brain on a daily basis.  Yet, most of the time I am too tired or lazy to express them.  So I really need to push myself to create.  

All I ever think about is wanting to be someone.  I dream of a life where I make my own rules and schedule.  I have grown really tired of trying to exist under rules which are basically another form of slavery.  How do I break through to an existence which I control?

The reason I have suffered with anxiety and depression is that I do not know how to create the life I dream of for myself.  I try so hard to find a way to escape from this existence that keeps trying to drown me.  I keep fighting the good fight.  I am beyond ready to reach the point where I can break free from this heaviness.